7 months and 1st Halloween

Ladybug celebrates her 1st Halloween and being 7 months old!!!

She's crying even when she's not crying....

at least in my head. On the very rare occasions that my precious daughter isn't yelling, screaming, whining or whimpering, and is sound asleep in my bed (a post for another day) I still hear her crying in my head. Like now for instance, she's fast asleep and I'm downstairs and I could swear that she's starting to cry. So I go part the way up the stairs to validate what I think I hear and nothing.....all I hear in her ocean lullaby Cd playing.

Does that mean that I'm just wired to respond and expect her to need me even when she doesn't? I feel like I'm always on "pause" never really in a moment, just trying to anticipate her next need/desire. I can honestly admit that I'm struggling to find a balance. Being a Mommy and a woman with her own needs and desires is hard. Anytime that I take the time out to do anything for myself I feel really guilty. Like going to the nail salon, out to dinner with friends, to the hair salon....hell, even to run errands, anytime I'm not with Olivia I feel like she thinks that I've abandoned her. I literally have to talk myself into following through on standing appointments that I have b/c being away from her for 8 hrs at work is a lot. Although I call and check on her twice a day, and I know she's in good, loving, caring hands. I still feel like I should be the one caring for her.

Maybe this feeling will dissipate when she gets older, or maybe it'll get worse.....I dunno. I just know that sometimes I get overwhelmed by it all and welcome the break, guilty feeling and all. Today was one of those days when I really needed some "me time" and I was so glad G was available and willing to let me take it. Whew....who knew that sleep would be a gift and taking a long, hot shower a sweet indulgence?

Wordless Wednesday

Just smiles and pretty girl overload today!

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Happy 6 Months Olivia!!!

6 months old and I am just amazed at how social, attentive and DEMANDING you are! You have definitely decided that your way is the best way and should come first no matter what! You're also full of smiles, exposing your two small pegs at the bottom and you LOVE to jump. You're a little jumping bean in everybody's lap. You've also managed to take over my queen sized bed! You didn't initially care for your walker, but you're slowly starting to warm up to it and have figured out how to push backwards in it but not forward yet. You're eating solids at your Ganny's house and your favorites seem to be squash, green beans and pears (this makes Mommy sooo happy and proud).

You are truly a joy and I could never imagine my life without you in it. As you advance towards becoming a 1-year old, I pray that you continue to be a happy little girl. That's been my prayer for you from the day I found out you were being formed in my womb. I will always be your #1 fan and supporter. I look forward to watching you grow into the amazing young woman that you're DSTined to become! ;-)

Infinite Love,
~Mommy
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Moooove!

Dear Mommy,

I love your bed! I mean I sleep like I'm in the womb when I'm in your bed. There is something so safe and comforting about being sprawled out in your bed. I know sometimes that I edge you out and you nearly fall out the bed, but know that at least I'm sleeping good :) I enjoy our cuddle time too. You're so soft.........did I mention how much I love your bed? You can have my bed if you want.

Wet kisses,
~Olivia
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Cartoon Break

Guess who's 5 months old today.....

That's right, Miss Olivia Gabrielle is 5 months old and I can hardly believe it. I know I say this every month, but its truly amazing to watch my little girl grow up right before my eyes. She's learning so much and is attentive to everything.
Olivia recognizes when her name is called and/or being used in a conversation. Whenever I'm updating her Granny or Dad about something she's done she always looks up at me as if to say "why are you telling my business?" TOO FUNNY!!

Miss Liv just might pull up before she crawls. She loves to be put in a standing position and she nearly leaps off of your leg. I should really be recording this stuff. She's not going to believe me when I tell her this when she's older.

I'm also proud to report that Olivia loves her veggies. She's "officially" eating food! She's still getting her bottles in but we've incorporated green beans, carrots, sweet potatoes, squash and pears into her otherwise liquid diet. She loves it and I'm so happy that she loves her veggies. Hopefully that will last ;-)

STTN is still kinda allusive as she usually wakes at least twice during. Her sleeping through the night is so sporadic that I have to mark the calendar to remember the day. I've started giving her a much heavier night bottle. What I like to call a rice cereal smoothie b/c its thicker than her normal bottle. My baby's belly gets full and she's out cold. Hopefully this will mean a good nights rest for me.........what a treat that would be ;-)
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